Try a little...

...tenderness. Especially when your Ooman has been hard at work in the office all day and is looking a bit glum. Remember, that salary pays for your litter, milk and kibbles. Sit on her lap, look up at her with your best 'I love you' face and purr loudly. Try shed as much hair as you can during the process, then every time Ooman finds a hair on her clothing/in her teacup/under the keys on the laptop it'll be a little reminder that you love her.

Don't overdo the displays of affection. Bald is not a good look for the average kitty.

Cupboard-cracking tip #1

Always check the edges of cuboard doors for packaging that might be trapped in them. Biscuit and bread wrappers are perfect. Pull on the stray wrapping and it should open the cupboard door. If you're lucky, there'll be a loaf of bread in easy reach. Each slice of bread tastes different. Have a bite of each slice to be sure you've found the tastiest.

Of course, bread will make you trump like a trooper. Be sure to do so in your Ooman's presence to remind her to keep tidier food cupboards.

Stealth cat

Curses!  After all my careful sharpening, Ooman had my claws clipped.  On the plus side, we have wooden floors throughout, so now she can't hear me coming...

Hahahahaha

Haaaahahahahahahah

MWAH HA HA HA HA HA!

Hello...

... I've sent Ooman out for more milk.  Whilst she's gone, I thought I'd introduce myself.

I'm Felix and I am a criminal genius.  The genius part is that, being feline, I am outside of the law.  I also have impeccable taste, hence the blog title.  I have one son who is tragically lacking in intelligence and one human who is at my beck and call.  Speaking of which, she'll be back soon and I need to sharpen these claws on the sofa while she's not looking.  More soon.

F